Leave it to California

If there is a bizarre political idea floating around, you can be sure that it either originated or took root in California. Such is the case with one-time and aspiring future Governor Jerry Brown (a/k/a Governor Moonbeam), who wants to force people to move out of suburbs and to instead live in city high-rise buildings, all in the name of preventing Global Warming: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB121642163643366589.html?mod=djemEditorialPage.

I live in suburbia, and there is a reason for that. I like having a front yard, back yard, and room for the commando basset hounds to roam around. I like the idea that when I wake up in the morning, a deer might be trotting down my street (yes, that has happened). I like the greenery around me. So, I hope that this wacky idea doesn't get any traction in this neck of the woods.

Pole dancing for gasoline

Someone should send this to James Taranto at the Wall Street Journal, for his "The World is Spinning out of Control" series: http://www.wafb.com/global/story.asp?s=8684852.

S0rry, maybe I'm just a hard-hearted jackass, but I'm having a lot of trouble taking this story seriously...........

Bizarre election factoid of the week: Obama is favored by people who don't own pets

I thought that just about every angle on this election had been covered, a tough achievement given that we're still only in early July, but now comes a new statistic: Barack Obama has a wide edge in polls done of people who don't own pets: http://news.yahoo.com/page/election-2008-political-pulse-pets-and-politics. Of course, the flip side of this is that John McCain has a lead among pet owners.

What does all of this mean? Not very much, probably, but I'd be willing to be that we'll see even more quirky stats get thrown our away as November approaches.

Gotcha!

Sacha Baron Cohen, who has made a career out of playing characters and "ambushing" people to conduct phony interviews, has done it again. His latest hijinks involve an Israeli Mossad agent and a Palestinian representative, who Cohen interrogated in Jerusalem: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,376847,00.html. Part of the interview involved a confused "Bruno" (one of Cohen's many alter egos) trying to figure out the difference between Hamas and hummus.

I admit that I'm a sick bastard, but I find this to be very, very funny..................

When peacocks go bad

A town in England is facing a growing threat from a band of peacocks which lives in the town. Previously, the birds had lived peacefully among the people, but the have grown increasingly aggressive of late: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/global/main.jhtml?xml=/global/2008/06/25/noindex/npeacok.xml&CMP=EMC-expat2008.

Maybe it's a function of my infantile sense of humour, or the fact that I am really tired (or both), but I find this story to be VERY funny.............

What if they held an election and no one showed up?

That's actually happened: http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=177198&in_page_id=2.

Why do I find this so funny?

Barack Obama, phone home!

A delegate at the upcoming Democratic National Convention in Denver has announced that he wants the city of Denver to establish a commission on extra-terrestrial affairs: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/2088554/Alien-video-man-Jeff-Peckman-asks-Barack-Obama-to-back-UFO-plan.html.

I wonder if Dennis Kucinich is available(http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2007/10/31/kucinich-i-saw-a-ufo/)?

Doomsday is-a coming!

And it will be next Thursday, June 12: http://abcnews.go.com/Blotter/story?id=5008225&page=1.


I was planning to get my lawn mowed that day. So much for that plan!

Crime story of the week

Have you ever been at a bar when someone has thrown a shrimp at you, causing you to become "alarmed and disturbed": http://www.thetelegraph.com/news/kimbrow_14576___article.html/report_says.html.

What kind of a world do we live in where people people are free to hurl shrimp at each other with impunity?

No stool pigeon!

An African Grey Parrot in Japan somehow got lost before being "captured" by police: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080521/ap_on_fe_st/odd_japan_parrot_returns. The thing I love about this story, apart from the happy ending? The bird absolutely would not talk to police, but once it was turned over to a vet, it started chattering away, telling the vet where it lived.

I don't know why, but I find this story to be very funny..........

Beware the Crazy Ants!

Seriously! There is a species of ants now infecting the Houston area which has a predilection for eating electrical equipment, or something like that: http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/front/5779654.html.

I guess that in a world that also has creatures like the Duck-billed Platypus, the Three-toed Sloth and the Walking Stick, there's room for these critters, too.............

Have you ever been tempted to do this?

Have you ever been minding your own business when you discover that your wife is having an affair, so you put her up for sale on eBay? Me neither, but one evidently ticked off Brit thought that this would be a great idea: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article1165282.ece.

I don't know why, but I find this story to absolutely hysterical. Then again, I am a deranged son of a gun....................

Plant rights; the latest European idiocy

I kid you not. This is what the Europeans are up to: http://www.weeklystandard.com/Content/Public/Articles/000/000/015/065njdoe.asp.

I guess that I shouldn't be surprised, but yet, I still am.......

I report, you decide

This is why some people should not be allowed to own dogs, and why poodles as a breed should be banned because they are SUCH fru-fru dogs: http://www.ocregister.com/video/index.php?bcpid=1127694947&bclid=1137834804&bctid=1231040168.

These people ALL need lives.

Miami drivers

I have always been a big fan of a good humour writer, and one of my favourites over the years has been Dave Barry, who still writes occasionally for the Miami Herald. Yesterday, he contributed this hysterical piece on Miami drivers, a subject that is near and dear to me given that I lived in Miami for three years: http://www.miamiherald.com/dave_barry/story/512599.html.

What I found particularly fascinating was that Miami is apparently introducing traffic circles to its driving world. Given that Miami drivers are already notorious for their complete lack of understanding of the rules of the road, that could make driving in the city even more fun than it already is!

I guess that it could be worse

Following up on my last post, a school in the U.K. sent a letter home to a student's parents because.........are you ready for this...........he is too flatulent: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article1006721.ece.

I never knew that breaking wind could cause such a stir.

I hate it when this happens

Don't you just hate it when you're minding your own business and then, out of nowhere, a wombat comes along and rapes you, leaving you with an Australian accent? Well, this poor man hates it, too: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/global/main.jhtml?xml=/global/2008/03/28/noindex/wwombat127.xml&CMP=EMC-expat2008.

Can't they keep it in their pants?

There's apparently a sex epidemic of sorts going on in the U.K.........only it's not between men and women. No, no, it's between men and various inanimate objects such as a vacuum cleaner, lamp post and bicycle: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/global/main.jhtml?xml=/global/2008/03/06/noindex/nlamppost106.xml. You have to wonder what would possesss a man to look at his mountain bike and think, "Say...........that's kind of cute! Maybe I'll get lucky with it tonight!"

Ugly athletes

We all adore atttractive athletes (well, I do, anyway). Get me a sporting event where Maria Sharapova is featured, or Natalie Gulbis, or Mia Hamm (why did she have to retire?), and I'll watch. However, there is a corollary here; for every attractive athlete, there is one who is, shall we say, not so attractive. One blog has done a survey of the Top 10 Ugly Athletes, which you can find here: http://www.armchairgm.com/Top_10_Ugliest_Athletes.

Beer is good for you!

Well, except maybe when you steal a beer truck and then crash it: http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=98354&in_page_id=2.

I don't know why, considering that it involved an armed robbery, but I find this story incredibly amusing...........